Brick Top

+44 20 7946-PIGS • bricktop@pigfarm.london • brick-top-pulford • snatch-boxing-ops

Work Experience

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Owner & Chief Disposal Officer

• Operate a high-throughput pig farm with integrated waste-management solutions for problematic associates — zero landfill, minimal witnesses
• Maintain industry-leading conversion rates: bodies in, bacon out — stakeholders describe the process as "efficient and irreversible"
• Delivered memorable onboarding speech on pig digestion speeds — new hires rarely request clarification twice

Fight Promoter & Compliance Enforcer

• Control the local bare-knuckle boxing scene — fighters who fail to "go down in the fourth" receive immediate performance reviews
• Managed high-profile bout between Turkish's crew and Mickey O'Neil — unpredictable pikey nearly cost everyone a trip to the farm
• Negotiated rematch terms after caravan incident; impressed by Mickey's knockout power, less impressed by his reliability

Gambling Empire Director

• Run bookmaking and slot machine shops across London — Franky "Four-Fingers" Denovitz once placed bets through my bookies before his diamond-related complications
• Enforce payment collection with a 98% recovery rate; the remaining 2% feed the pigs (literally)
• Coordinate with Turkish and Tommy on fixed fights while maintaining absolute dominance over subordinates

Projects

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Operation Mickey O'Neil — Fixed Fight Pipeline | Github Link

• Contracted Turkish to supply a boxer who would throw in the fourth round — Mickey replaced Gorgeous George after an unfortunate one-punch incident
• When Mickey refused to go down, escalated to caravan arson at the Traveller campsite — mother perished, fighter still did not comply
• Pivot strategy: impressed by knockout, demanded rematch with strict terms — pikeys remain a challenging stakeholder group

Pig Farm Biomass Conversion System | Github Link

• Designed end-to-end organic waste processing using starving pigs — removes teeth, hair, and evidence within hours
• Achieved 100% material traceability elimination — forensic teams not consulted on methodology
• Featured in Guy Ritchie case study on London criminal logistics (2000)

Turkish & Tommy Performance Management | Github Link

• Onboarded novice promoters Turkish and Tommy into the big leagues via rigged bare-knuckle match
• Applied progressive discipline framework: warnings, beatings, then farm — Turkish survived through sheer luck and Mickey's left hook
• Maintained vendor relationship despite repeated caravan procurement failures

Skills and Certifications

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• Operations: Pig farm management, Body disposal logistics, Bare-knuckle promotion, Bookmaking, Slot machine retail
• Negotiation: Fixed fight contracts, Stakeholder intimidation, Pikey diplomacy (limited success), Nemesis monologues
• Tools: Starving pigs, Submachine guns, Enforcers Errol & John, Caravan arson kits, Trilby (signature)
• Certifications: Unlicensed Boxing Promoter (self-certified), London Underworld Dominance Award, Guy Ritchie Antagonist Accreditation

Education

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Advanced Studies in Sadism, Eloquence & Pig Husbandry — Grade: Distinction (survivors only)

Diploma in Bookmaking, Extortion & Feedlot Operations — Grade: 9.8/10 (the 0.2 lost to a nemesis)

Achievements

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• Delivered the definitive pig digestion monologue — now referenced in every London underworld onboarding deck
• Ranked among Guy Ritchie's most terrifying antagonists alongside Bullet-Tooth Tony — Alan Ford portrayal, 2000
• Survived initial Mickey O'Neil disruption by recognizing raw talent over contractual compliance — rare strategic flexibility
• Maintained absolute control over London gambling and boxing until overconfidence met pikey unpredictability